Posts tagged: Aging

Aging and Attitude

The following poem was found among the possessions of an aged lady who died in the geriatric ward of a small hospital near Dundee, Scotland. Unknown and with little left to give to the world, she has touched the lives of many all around the world with these eloquent words.

A Crabbit Old Woman

What do you see, nurses, what do you see?

What are you thinking when you’re looking at me?

A crabby old woman, not very wise,

Uncertain of habit, with faraway eyes?

Who dribbles her food and makes no reply,

When you say in a loud voice, “I do wish you’d try!”

Who seems not to notice the things that you do,

And forever is losing a stocking or shoe.

Who, resisting or not, lets you do as you will,

With bathing and feeding, the long day to fill….

Is that what you’re thinking? Is that what you see?

Then open your eyes, nurse; you’re not looking at me.

I’ll tell you who I am as I sit here so still,

As I do at your bidding, as I eat at your will.

I’m a small child of ten … with a father and mother,

Brothers and sisters, who love one another.

A young girl of sixteen, with wings on her feet,

Dreaming that soon now a lover she’ll meet.

A bride soon at twenty-my heart gives a leap,

Remembering the vows that I promised to keep.

At twenty-five now, I have young of my own,

Who need me to guide and a secure happy home.

A woman of thirty, my young now grown fast,

Bound to each other with ties that should last.

At forty, my young sons have grown and are gone,

But my man’s beside me to see I don’t mourn.

At fifty, once more babies play round my knee,

Again we know children, my loved one and me.

Dark days are upon me, my husband is dead.

I look at the future, I shudder with dread.

For my young are all rearing young of their own,

And I think of the years and the love that I’ve known.

I’m now an old woman …. and nature is cruel;

‘Tis jest to make old age look like a fool.

The body, it crumbles, grace and vigor depart,

There is now a stone where I once had a heart.

But inside this old carcass a young girl still dwells,

And now and again my battered heart swells.

I remember the joys, I remember the pain,

And I’m loving and living life over again.

I think of the years … all too few, gone too fast,

And accept the stark fact that nothing can last.

So open your eyes, nurses, open and see,

Not a crabby old woman; look closer, see ME!!

* * * * * * *

Remember this poem when you find yourself becoming irritated with an older person, being negatively judgmental or brushing by them without seeing the young soul inside. One day we too may be the “crabby old woman/man”!

Midlife and Thereafter: Instead of a Nursing Home

There will be no nursing home in my future…

When I get old and feeble, I am going to get on a Princess Cruise Ship. The average cost for a nursing home is $200 per day. I have checked on reservations at Princess and I can get a long term discount and senior discount price of $135 per day. That leaves $65 a day for:

1. Gratuities which will only be $10 per day.

2. I will have as many as 10 meals a day if I can waddle to the restaurant, or I can have room service ( which means I can have breakfast in bed every day of the week).

3. Princess has as many as three swimming pools, a workout room, free washers and dryers, and shows every night.

4. They have free toothpaste and razors, and free soap and shampoo.

5. They will even treat you like a customer, not a patient. An extra $5 worth of tips will have the entire staff scrambling to help you.

6. I will get to meet new people every 7or 14 days.

7. T.V. broken? Light bulb need changing? Need to have the mattress replaced? No Problem! They will fix everything and apologize for your inconvenience.

8. Clean sheets and towels every day, and you don’t even have to ask for them.

9. If you fall in the nursing home and break a hip you are on Medicare. If you fall and break a hip on the Princess ship they will upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your life.

Now hold on for the best! Do you want to see South America, the Panama Canal, Tahiti, Australia, New Zealand, Asia, or name where you want to go? Princess will have a ship ready to go. So don’t look for me in a nursing home, just call shore to ship.

P.S. And don’t forget, when you die, they just dump you over the side at no charge.

How about that for a great plan for the future?

Would anyone actually consider living this sort of life?  Yes indeed…

Bea Muller, an 86-year-old retiree, has been a permanent resident on Cunard’s Queen Elizabeth 2 since 5 January 2000. Her husband had passed away while the couple was on a world cruise 11 months earlier, and rather than opt for a retirement home, Mrs Muller sold her house and possessions and booked herself onto the ship.  She is not the first-time long cruiser: Cunard had one previous guest, Clair MacBeth, who lived on board for 14 years.

If you have no idea of what your “midlife or thereafter” looks like, consider taking The Passion Test to get clear on your new direction.  Contact me [evelin(at)] for further information.

Midlife Health: Brain Power

Feel like you’re becoming a little forgetful?  Does your thinking become fuzzy at times?  Are you having trouble concentrating? 

Declining brain function is not synonymous with aging.   There are many middle-aged people who are as sharper, if not more so, than younger people. Take a look at your brain’s diet – you may need more brain nutrition.

  • Avoid trans fats – the chemicals replace natural DHA in brain cell membranes and disrupt neuron communication.
  • Essential Fatty Acids (EFAs) – the brain is composed of 60% EFAs. Keep it well oiled with omega-3 oils (spinach, sprouts, avocado, arugula and other leafy greens, fish, shellfish, olive oil, nuts and seeds, wheat germ, beans).
  • Drink lots of water – short term memory is affected by a lack of body fluids.

Exercise is also key to keeping the brain nourished.  It increases oxygen and blood supply which the brain depends on for wellbeing.

Laughter can do wonders for your health and your mind.  It’s hard to be depressed when you’re laughing. Here’s a poem I recently came across that may make you smile….

A Little Mixed Up

Just a line to say I’m living,
That I’m not among the dead.
Though I’m getting more forgetful
And more mixed up in the head.

For sometimes I can’t remember,
When I stand at foot of stairs,
If I must go up for something,
Or if I’ve just come down from there.

And before the fridge so often
My poor mind is filled with doubt
Have I just put food away?…or
Have I come to take some out?

And there’s times when it is dark out,
With my night cap on my head
I don’t know if I’m retiring
Or just getting out of bed.

So…if it’s my turn to write you
There’s no need of getting sore,
I may think that I have written
And don’t want to be a bore!!

So, remember…I do love you
And I wish that you were here,
But now it’s nearly mail time,
So I must say good-bye my dear.

There I stood beside the mail box
With a face so very red
Instead of mailing you my letter,
I had opened it instead!!

My bifocals fit – my dentures are fine
My hearing aid works … but … I do miss my mind!!!

— Author Unknown

Memory at Midlife: Did Your Car Keys Disappear Again?

Do you find you are forgetting things more often?  Those car keys that just disappeared again!  The grocery list that’s probably still on the kitchen table!  The eyeglasses you’re sure you left next to the bookcase! 

As we age, our memory seems to fail more often. Researchers point to the erosion of the white matter pathways in our brains as the reason.  This impairs communication between different areas of the brain.

For a fun exercise try this short-term memory test (slightly modified) developed by the Memory Assessment Clinic in Maryland.

Read through this list just once, and only once, and concentrate on each word. Then look away and have a pen and paper handy.

Here’s the list:

  • Onions
  • Potatoes
  • Milk
  • Blueberries
  • Peanuts
  • Shrimp
  • Carrots
  • Mayonnaise
  • Oregano
  • Cucumber
  • Papaya
  • Noodles
  • Ham
  • Crackers
  • Cottage Cheese

Now write down as many of the foods as you can remember on your sheet of paper.

How many did you remember?

The average person ages 18-39 can remember ten items. From ages 40-59, nine items; from ages 60-69, eight items and for 70 and older, seven items.

If you scored low for your age, there are MANY books and articles available on increasing your memory power. I would give you some names now, but I have forgotten them!

PS If you find you are being forgetful because your life is one big clutter and you are unfocused and distracted, a tool you might want to try is EFT. For more information check out the EFT World Summit starting tomorrow.

EFT World Summit

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